


from future you, 2016

by reddies_eggos1711



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: M/M, Reddie, but not because cry, canon but when you turn 18 you get a letter from future you, happy birthday much, i got bored and bro i'm depressed from this movie, it's pretty shit as usual but eh whatchu gonna do, legit wrote this in the five minutes before class, mostly canon, richie doesn't remember
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-15 00:02:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20609546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reddies_eggos1711/pseuds/reddies_eggos1711
Summary: On everyone's 18th birthday they receive a letter from their future selves. Richie gets one from his 40-year-old self telling him to tell Eddie how he feels before it’s too late. The problem? Richie doesn't know an Eddie. And Richie's not gay.





	from future you, 2016

**Author's Note:**

> me after seeing the movie = stan and eddie  
yep that's right, we all dead

It happens to everyone. It’s a universal thing. When you turn eighteen you receive a letter from your future self at some point. Only one letter so future-you has to really think when to send it. If future you never sends a letter for some dark reason like death or the dramatic loss of caring at all, then on your eighteenth you receive a blank letter.

Richie’s isn’t blank.

He knew some people who had received blank letters. When he first moved to his new school three years before he’d made friends with a boy named Caitlyn. Fast forward to Caitlyn’s eighteenth birthday when he received a blank letter. Long story short, Caitlyn went a bit… odd after that and they weren’t friends anymore.

Richie is older than his other friends so his letter comes first. It isn’t something he is particularly eager for. He is expecting some sappy bullshit about the family he’d grow up to have or just simply a warning about something stupid he is bound to do. Like, ‘don’t kiss Katie at the party. She’s a slut and is going to shit talk you across school’. Well, it’d be a couple of months too late for that one.

But, no, Richie isn’t excited for his letter. He couldn’t care less what his older self has to say about him. Probably just talk trash anyway.

But his parents convince him to open it. And, well, he can’t _not_ listen to them.

It’s short, that’s the first thing he notices. But there are words on the page so that’s something. His older self cares at least.

Then he notices the date. Well, not a date, but a year. 2016. The letter was sent from his 40-year-old self. He wonders why. Maybe he dies at forty and these are his last words. Wouldn’t that be a great birthday – _you die when you’re forty, happy fucking birthday._

But no, the words aren’t deathbed words.

They’re odd and Richie doesn’t know what to make of them.

_‘Richie,_

_Happy birthday, bud. Never really had anything to say to you until now and I’m sorry if you were expecting something different. But… don’t change shit all about your life, you’re doing just fine. _

_Just… do one thing for me, will you?_

_Tell Eddie how you feel – how you** really** feel – before it’s too late._

_Alright that’s it, I guess. Live it up, kid. _

_~from future you, 2016’_

Well, there are a few things to decode at least. But before he can think them over even for a second, his mother grabs the note from his hands and is reading it too.

“Who’s Eddie?” She asks, but Richie has no answer for her.

He doesn’t know. Who is Eddie? And what feelings? Feelings for someone named Eddie? Feelings as in… liking someone feelings? That can’t be right. Richie doesn’t like boys, no. He’d told himself that before. _You’re not gay. Gay people get killed._ Though it wasn’t very believable, Richie believed it. He doesn’t like boys. He doesn’t like Eddie. He doesn’t even know an Eddie. Maybe he just hasn’t met Eddie? Maybe Eddie is a girl?

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Richie can feel the words ‘Eddie Spaghetti’ tugging on his thoughts. _But what an odd thing to think. It can’t be anything worth thinking. _So he shoves the odd thought down and goes back to staring at the letter.

“Richie? Who’s Eddie?” His mother repeats as though his silence wasn’t enough of an answer for her.

“I don’t know, mom. I don’t know an Eddie.”

But he thinks he does.

He doesn’t know where it comes from but there’s suddenly a memory. A memory of arguing over a hammock in an unfamiliar place. A memory of passive-aggressively deciding to share the hammock… and then being kicked in the face. Arguing, fighting, kicking doesn’t particularly sound very great, but Richie is filled with the strong feeling that the memory is fond. Was this Eddie?

But the other person in the memory is hazy. He can’t make out very much at all. A vague outline at most. He doesn’t recognize the memory. Is it even his own?

“Before it’s too late? What do you think that means?” His mother persists.

Richie can only shrug.

Maybe this Eddie finds someone else, or moves away, or… dies.

Not that it should matter. Because Richie doesn’t know an Eddie, let alone have feelings for him.

Suddenly there’s another memory. This one is clearer. In the memory, Richie is alone. He stands on a bridge, The rails are littered with carvings and Richie feels the name ‘The Kissing Bridge’ pulling on his thoughts. He sees himself knelt down at the rail, a pocket knife in his hand. He finishes carving and leans back to look at his work.

R + E

_Richie + Eddie_

Richie is confused. In the memory Richie was young, like fourteen at the most. So it had already happened, obviously. But he doesn’t remember doing it. He’d met Eddie before but didn’t remember.

But if Richie tries hard enough he remembers some things.

Richie thinks he remembers a short boy.

He thinks he remembers a short angry boy who bickered with him constantly.

He thinks he remembers _cute, cute, cute._

He’s not totally sure but he thinks he remembers angry little hands gripping frantically at an inhaler.

He thinks he remembers an arm cast, black letters spelling out LOSER with a red V crossed over the S. LOVER.

He thinks he remembers being a dick. That’s how boys cope with feelings, right? By being mean?

He thinks he remembers his heart racing, his palms sweating, his breath hitching and he hides it all skillfully with another joke.

He thinks he remembers smiling when he thought Eddie wasn’t looking and wishing he could talk.

But as he puts the letter from his future self back in the envelope, Richie doesn’t remember anything.

Richie doesn’t remember.

Because Richie doesn’t know an Eddie.

And Richie isn’t gay.

**Author's Note:**

> coolio. thx. bye


End file.
